Ok, so there are those pesky day-to-day issues and frustrations. My job, teaching 7-12 graders, is not easy. In fact, there were those days when I wondered if I was strong enough to handle it. Up until almost the last day of inservice, I was falling apart in tears about once a month. But it is MY job. Actually, it is a vehicle for fulfilling my purpose, to shine and make treasure shine. But it is MINE. It is a reason to get up in the morning. And for someone who, three years ago, didn't have that, this is amazing. In fact, three years ago I didn't get up most mornings, choosing to sleep the day away and stay awake all night to avoid the world. How different life is now! How far Yahweh has brought me.
And part of coming so far was my job. I learned so much this year, and so, despite the tears and fears, it was worth it. And next year will be better. In the meantime, just when I was sure I couldn't take anymore, Yahweh gives me summer break, where I can recharge, replenish, and recover from the school year. That way, in August, I can go back into the classroom full of life, light, and optimism. But also a little wiser, and a whole lot better at my job. So how can I not be grateful for my teaching career?
Of course things aren't perfect on the outside. We live in a fallen world, but now I am no longer fallen. I am redeemed. I am a son of Yahweh. Yahweh, who healed me just because He is healing, and He loves me. And in so doing, He made it possible for me, who never even dreamed of this life, to live. I have a job, my own apartment, and responsibilities. I have an ecclesia governed by elders who are completely trustworthy as they share Yahweh's heart, I have friends who love and accept me for who I am while not being afraid to help me become better by speaking the truth in love. I have a mom who has grown so much in the past two years. I have joy, faith, and trust in myself. I even have a dog! Scrappy. (See picture).
If you had asked me three years ago where I saw myself in three years, I couldn't have said. I literally couldn't have imagined this awesome life I have. Ephesians 3:20 is literally true. He is able to do exceedingly and abundantly above all that we ask or think.
In fact, everything in the Bible is literally true. And the most amazing thing is, I am seeing it become real to ME in MY life. Every healing in the Gospels is real to ME because it happened to me. The story where Yahshua healed the lepers and only one thanked Him...that grateful tenth leper is ME. The rainbow being a promise of eternal fidelity...Yahweh has been faithful to ME, and He has even made ME to be faithful.
Yahweh is no respecter of persons. Sometimes it is easy to count the trials, but the pressure is what makes the wellsprings of life well UP in you. And I know it is so totally worth it!
